"What Happened in Ventura"
First let me explain a small back story. I suffer from depression, bi polar disorder and anxiety. The night before I was crying in the back of my bus because
Usually when im upset, I go see my nieces/nephew or cuddle my dogs. On tour I have neither, and I have trouble controlling my emotions. Well in ventura I get up to play my set. The crowd was lively and amazing. I get to my 3rd song “Aware” and as always I explain the back story. I explain that people are mistaken to think its a song about the “friend zone” and how no woman owes me, or any man, anything. Its a song about a girl that only told me she was in love with me in private and denied it to the world, and gave me the lamest excuses of why. I was her friend for 7 years.
Well I start playing the song and after the first chorus, I notice this girl in the front row, who is absolutely fucking hysterical. Can barely hold herself up. I stop playing and walk to her. It broke me into a million pieces to see her like that. I hugged her and held her and asked what was wrong and she could barely speak. I bring her side stage and play the rest of my set, while bawling my eyes out. Because I was just so emotional. After the set I found out that she too, suffers from bi polar and didnt know how to handle life. We connected on such a personal level. In a sea of thousands, two people were horribly alone and through music, we found eachother. This girl will always hold a special place in my heart forever.
Thank you to all of you for living this life with me.