frontporchstepofficial:

"What Happened in Ventura" First let me explain a small back story. I suffer from depression, bi polar disorder and anxiety. The night before I was crying in the back of my bus because Usually when im upset, I go see my nieces/nephew or cuddle my dogs. On tour I have neither, and I have trouble controlling my emotions. Well in ventura I get up to play my set. The crowd was lively and amazing. I get to my 3rd song “Aware” and as always I explain the back story. I explain that people are mistaken to think its a song about the “friend zone” and how no woman owes me, or any man, anything. Its a song about a girl that only told me she was in love with me in private and denied it to the world, and gave me the lamest excuses of why. I was her friend for 7 years.
Well I start playing the song and after the first chorus, I notice this girl in the front row, who is absolutely fucking hysterical. Can barely hold herself up. I stop playing and walk to her. It broke me into a million pieces to see her like that. I hugged her and held her and asked what was wrong and she could barely speak. I bring her side stage and play the rest of my set, while bawling my eyes out. Because I was just so emotional. After the set I found out that she too, suffers from bi polar and didnt know how to handle life. We connected on such a personal level. In a sea of thousands, two people were horribly alone and through music, we found eachother. This girl will always hold a special place in my heart forever.
Thank you to all of you for living this life with me.

frontporchstepofficial:

"What Happened in Ventura"
First let me explain a small back story. I suffer from depression, bi polar disorder and anxiety. The night before I was crying in the back of my bus because
Usually when im upset, I go see my nieces/nephew or cuddle my dogs. On tour I have neither, and I have trouble controlling my emotions. Well in ventura I get up to play my set. The crowd was lively and amazing. I get to my 3rd song “Aware” and as always I explain the back story. I explain that people are mistaken to think its a song about the “friend zone” and how no woman owes me, or any man, anything. Its a song about a girl that only told me she was in love with me in private and denied it to the world, and gave me the lamest excuses of why. I was her friend for 7 years.

Well I start playing the song and after the first chorus, I notice this girl in the front row, who is absolutely fucking hysterical. Can barely hold herself up. I stop playing and walk to her. It broke me into a million pieces to see her like that. I hugged her and held her and asked what was wrong and she could barely speak. I bring her side stage and play the rest of my set, while bawling my eyes out. Because I was just so emotional. After the set I found out that she too, suffers from bi polar and didnt know how to handle life. We connected on such a personal level. In a sea of thousands, two people were horribly alone and through music, we found eachother. This girl will always hold a special place in my heart forever.

Thank you to all of you for living this life with me.

(via rasputin)

I imagined the lies the valedictorian was telling them right now. About the exciting future that lies ahead. I wish she’d tell them the truth: Half of you have gone as far in life as you’re ever going to. Look around. It’s all downhill from here. The rest of us will go a bit further, a steady job, a trip to Hawaii, or a move to Phoenix, Arizona, but out of fifteen hundred how many will do anything truly worthwhile, write a play, paint a painting that will hang in a gallery, find a cure for herpes? Two of us, maybe three? And how many will find true love? About the same. And enlightenment? Maybe one. The rest of us will make compromises, find excuses, someone or something to blame, and hold that over our hearts like a pendant on a chain.

Janet Fitch, White Oleander (via quotethat)

(via ketamollicaine)